I never belonged anywhere and that's why i live in a world of my own. My fantasies are so vivid, they're like a lucid dream. I can control everything. I can be whomever i want to be. I can do whatever i want and have anything or anyone i desire. But its all just fantasy. I'm trying to create a reality where i can be myself; in future that is. I have had very few people in my life. I know i love my mum and my brother but thats it i dnt love anyone else not even myself. Sometimes i can't stand them bcoz am never myself around them. I am so tired of lying but the truth would hurt them so bad. I want to be left alone. Each time i look in the mirror i see a stranger. I was once beautiful, intelligent and so full of life. I can't control anything anymore. I just want to be happy. I just want to love myself oncemore and to let others love me.